>> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live: this week." tonight -- james franco. >> jimmy: we should have sent you a car. >> >> dicky: josh groban. >> sex. have i got your attention h. >> what do people say when they see you? you're the guy -- >> jessica alba kisses strangers. rachel weisz. jeff bobby flay. and this week in unnecessary krer censorship. and now, once again, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ]

>> jimmy: i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for braving temperatures to be here tonight. it was, as you know, 62 degrees and sunny in l.a. today and most of the country looks like it got hit by a coors light commercial. we're lucky. winter storm nemo moving out, moving storm orca in, some people have three feet of snow, some people meant power outages and others it meant new ins instagram photos. snow has replaced ins ed lunch instagram. nothing sadder than the guy standing in line at the super market on valentine's day night clutching whatever wilted roses were left in the store, maybe a pantyhose egg as a gift.

do they still come in eggs? >> no. >> jimmy: just a bad scene. a lot of pressure on valentine's. not for me. tonight i'm take a special lady out tonight and that lady is myself. [ cheers and applause ] for those of you at home right now getting into bed, this of course is the sexing hour and i don't want to interrupt that but i also don't want you to turn the show off. as a courtesy i'll ask everybody in the studio, anybody on camera, cover their eyes, dicky, cleto, guillermo. those of you at home, let the love-making process begin. do whatever comes naturally. okay. oh, not finished. all right. okay. all right. go ahead and finish. finish, finish, finish, finish. finish. and. okay. finished. good job.

[ applause ] on the subject of love, soon to be parents kim kardashian and kanye west were in rio this weekend, they stopped to see the famous statue of christ of the redeemer and decided to pose like christ the redeemer. it's ironic because christ died for our sins and kim got eight reality shows for hers. some people were upset about this. even jesus who turns the other cheek couldn't help but swap them away. whenever the president gives a state of the union the other party gives a rebuttal, marco rubio rebust for tdid for the g. he said you can't have a middle class without rich, without an

upper class how would you know you were middle class? you wouldn't, you might think you were rich. he's right. without an upper class to not be a part of, how would you even know you were middle class? you might think you were rich. that would screw everything up, so you need rich people to etch have a middle class. just like you need biggie fries to have regular sized fries. [ applause ] technically, you need poor people, too, although he did not point that out. while rubio covered a lot in this rebuttal, most everyone seems to be focused on this. >> we can't remain powerful if we don't have an economy that can afford it. in the short time that i've been here in washington, nothing has frustrated me more than false choices like the one the president laid out tonight. the choice isn't just between big government and big business. >> jimmy: that's what you get when you eat a whole bag of snyder's bavarian pretzels before a speech. i've watched that a number of times. how about the way he never takes his eyes off the camera when he's reaching for the water. it's like drop the gun on the floor. put down the gun.

but what a night for poland spring. you cannot buy that kind of product placement. at least i hope you can't buy it, but in washington, who knows? why was the water so far away? it would have been less awkward if he reached down the front of his pants to get it. [ laughter ] it would have been less awkward had he been wearing one of these on his head during his speech. [ laughter ] some very big news out of the vatican where the pope announced he was resigning. he saw the grammys last night and said, what's the point? the pope is 85 years old. apparently he doesn't feel like he's strong enough to continue with his papal duties. are you happy now, twitter, you broke the pope? i wonder how the pope resigns. do you walk into god's office and quit? what would the pope do for work from now on? he could become the most overqualified walmart greeter of all time. the pope will step down on february 28th.

basically gave jesus two weeks' notice and new pope is expected to be chosen by the end of the march, winner selected this time by a combination of god's judgment and viewer texts. we may get a brazilian pope, which sounds like a hair removal process, doesn't it? there was a funny moment when the president got to the podium. as is customary, obama handed two envelopes, each a copy of the speech to the vice and spea boehner got a special envelope. "sports illustrated" going under his mattress. [ cheers and applause ] thank you. thank you. we work very hard on that stuff. i appreciate your enthusiasm. i really like josh groban. he's a very nice guy. very talented guy. josh has a new product he's

endorsing and i don't typically let our guests run commercials during our show, but this is something he's very passionate about. he's done a lot for us here at the show. also i think this is good for our viewers who might be looking for a way to spice up the romance in their life. so take a look. >> hello there. i'm josh groban. sex. have i got your attention? let me say it again. sex. do you have sex? do you sometimes feel like you aren't good at sex? well, now you are. going to be. these are josh groban sex pills. the first pill clinically proven to make you more good at sex. even doctors agree. >> i'm a doctor, and i agree. when you take josh groban's sex pills, special sex chemicals travel to your privates to make them more good at sex. how much more good? a lot more good. >> thanks, doc.

you know, people everywhere are talking about josh groban's new sex pills. just ask this happy customer. >> before i took josh groban's sex pills, i didn't even know how to do sex. now i have so much sex, i have to keep some of it in this shoe box. thanks, josh groban. >> oh, you're welcome. and happy sex. and remember, guys. ♪ they'll bring you romance so take a chance you feel them working in your pants ♪ i respect you ♪ josh groban sex pills make you good at sex ♪ ♪ yeah i feel a tingle in my bali balingaling ♪ >> order josh groban sex pills today, because you can't spell

groban without bonar -- g. >> available at walgreens. >> jimmy: thank you, josh. one more thing. thursday night, time for weekly tribute to the fcc where we bleep and blur things whether they need it or not. this week in unnecessary censorship. >> we will draw upon the courage and skills of our sisters and daughters and moms because women have proven under fire that they are ready for [ bleep ]. >> i want to [ bleep ] jay-z. i want to [ bleep ] taylor. >> tonight a [ bleep ] fiasco. >> we are at the world famous gorgeous opera house in london's [ bleep ] garden. >> it's tough to even look into the camera, the snow is almost [ bleep ] you in the face. >> a big guy at heart even though i've had a couple [ bleep ], but i think it's a big year. >> i'm savannah guthrie and together we're [ bleep ] america. >> the largest [ bleep ] outside

vietnam. >> a very nice balance of salty and sour to the mild flavor of the [ bleep ]. >> dude, you're ripped. >> [ bleep ]. >> b[ bleep ] you. >> name something you do to your body. >> you [ bleep ] it. >> good answer. up next, internet sensation. >> ravens, and queen of england. >> that goes without saying. >> james franco drops in. >> your first time in a real one? >> yeah. thank you. >> jimmy: wow. [ female announcer ] going to sleep may be easy, but when you wake up in the middle of the night it can be frustrating. it's hard to turn off and go back to sleep. intermezzo is the first and only prescription sleep aid approved for use as needed in the middle of the night when you can't get back to sleep.

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[ cheers and applause ]

>> jimmy: a fantastic eyoutube clip, an unlikely hero named kai, in case you're not famil r familiar, here is the local fox affiliate in fresno. >> a man claiming he's jesus plows into an pg & e worker pinning him because the worker was black. the man's passenger had a hatchet and innocent bystanders come the rescue. >> i come to realize i'm jesus christ and i can do anything i [ bleep ] want to. bam, he smashed into the car, pinned him into between [ bleep ] -- >> homeless hitchhiker in the passenger seat when this went down. >> these two women trying to help him and he grabs one of them like a guy that big can snap a woman's neck like a pencil, [ bleep ] up behind with a hatchet, smash, smash, smash! dude. >> jimmy: you know you should

never pick up hitchhikers, except for that one. the reporter that found kai wisely posted the entirety of the interview online and that became a viral sensation. >> can i get your name? >> i'm kai. kai. >> do you have a last name? >> no, dog, i don't have anything. >> where are you from originally? fresno? >> west virginia. >> no kidding. how old are you? >> i can't call it. >> jimmy: ladies and gentlemen, please say hi to kai. kai, jump in the car. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: not on the car, in the car. >> jimmy kimmel, bud. >> oh, keep your eye on the road, man. >> jimmy: welcome. how are you? >> excellent. how about yourself? >> jimmy: a lot of people are calling you a hero.

you thwarted that crazy guy. >> not so much difference between him and who they say is gee ju jesus, is there? >> jimmy: i don't know. i haven't met him. did he have a beard? >> no. no, no. he's a -- fat, rich white guy. >> jimmy: you have become famous from youtube. people are recognizing you? what do people say to you when they see you? >> they say, hey, you're kai. you're that dude with the hatchet. i'm like not anymore. they took it from me. i was trying to build this cool treehouse and make a dreamcatcher and put wood planks on the floor and have another poop above with the chain dangling down beneeth that one and tied up to the tree to drape tarps across that on on the inside some bed sheets with moss for insulation and a crab shack there on the inside of a [ bleep ] on the inside of a hot water tank

heater. yeah, yeah. burn some wood. >> jimmy: all that with a hatchet? is this a magic hatchet that you wave and contractors appear? >> no i'm just a [ bleep ] -- [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: is it true you will sometimes go into stores and take things and give the things to poor people? >> i jack [ bleep ] from wal-mart and target. big grocery carts and safeway. walk out with two 30 packs of budweiser like do you want to come party and hook them up with another dude and be like have a great life. >> jimmy: would you consider becoming the pope? there is a position available. >> do i have to look like that first? >> jimmy: one of the things you said on video you wanted to get a wetsuit and minnie mouse

surfboard -- they can prophesize the ravens are going to win and they can prove the ravens can prophesize and that is why there are two ravens in the tower of london. >> jimmy: that goes without saying. step outside the car. i don't know if you'll give this away immediately. [ cheers and applause ] there you go. do with it as you will. if you choose to give it away then so be it. you all right, kai? all right. kai, the hitchhiker, everybody. >> dicky: up next, james franco on being the wizard of oz. >> jimmy: how do you prepare? >> dicky: jessica alba in the celebrity kissing booth. >> some of the biggest perverts

in hollywood have assembled tonight. but that doesn't happen much anymore. the creative process never stops. and songwriting is so hard, but i love it. these days, i guess i just don't want to miss a thing. [ laughs ] i miss you guys. that's me. and this is my windows phone. [ male announcer ] now get a windows phone 8x by htc for just $99.99 at verizon.

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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: new movie "oz the great and powerful" opens in theaters march 8. join pg us by hot air please welcome james franco. there is james, still in the balloon. the eagle has landed. you are serious about reducing your carbon footprint traveling

by hot air balloon. >> i know. >> jimmy: yellow brick road and everything, how festive everything is. all right, there he is. [ applause ] i'd know him anywhere. he has entered the premises. he is making his way through the lobby. only three quarters of a mile left to go. [ cheers and applause ] look at this. there he is. james franco. we should have sent a car for you, that would have been easier. great to see you. how you doing? everything all right? >> yeah, that was good. that was exciting. thank you. >> jimmy: did you like being in the balloon? i usually get sick in hot air balloons. >> you take a lot of hot air balloon rides? >> jimmy: i took one and i was nauseated the whole time. and my hair got hot. started to curl up. >> you're a tall guy. yeah. >> jimmy: yeah. it was not a pleasant experience for me. >> i've never been in one.

in this movie, i ride in one, but it's all -- >> jimmy: it's all fake. that was your first time in a real one? >> yeah. thank you. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i know your grandma is here with you tonight. >> there she is. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you spoke about your grandmother the last time you were here. your grandma mitzi. >> and she likes to go by mitz the vitz. i don't know why. >> jimmy: what does the vitz mean? >> the vitz means son of a vitz. [ laughter ] [ applause ] >> jimmy: by the way, she must be very proud of your art. you had a big art show in berlin last weekend. >> i did. >> jimmy: it was all your art. >> yeah. >> jimmy: it's called gay town. why is it called gay town? were you in gay town? no, you weren't in gay town. >> the show was paintings. it had blankets. it had videos. that's a painting of the water polo team from my high school.

from the yearbook. >> jimmy: is this you on the water polo team? >> no, i wasn't on the water polo team. i wanted to be, but i never -- >> jimmy: that's your actual water polo team, huh? now this one -- >> that's a painting that -- of a hunk calendar that we did senior year and i was in the hunk calendar and they called me james "the thinker" franco. >> jimmy: your muscularity back then was enormous. must have been on the juice back then. >> this is a collage. >> jimmy: this says k-stew. is that kristen stewart? >> she plays snow white. >> jimmy: finally we have -- >> that's a series of have, they're paintings, but there's actual jackets in there. i thought they were just really gestural. >> jimmy: it's not an extra coat? another coat? >> it's also fun. >> jimmy: it was that too? >> well, it's a coat -- yeah, i

guess. >> jimmy: so i just thought of that is what you're saying. so in a way, we have created a piece of art together. and are you still teaching your college courses? >> i am. i have a couple students here. i don't know if they made it in here. >> jimmy: you do? >> i teach at ucla. >> jimmy: every week you're teaching an english class and a filmmaking class? >> not only that, we make movies. so in the film classes, we make movies and i act in them and then i get great actors to come and be a part of it. >> jimmy: wow. >> natalie portman is in one. kristen wiig is doing it. i was acting in one yesterday. in fact, we were -- this is a weird story, but we were in big bear -- [ laughter ] like five minutes from where all that horrible stuff went down. and i was -- in the movie, i was driving a sheriff car, too, so it was really weird. >> jimmy: oh, my god. wow.

>> and there were, like, you know, s.w.a.t. team trucks going right by where we were shooting. >> jimmy: that's crazy. and yet as a young filmmaker, that's as much production value as you could possibly ask for. >> it didn't work for our movie. we just needed an old fashioned sheriff car. >> jimmy: that's where you rewrite the whole script immediately. that's unbelievable. >> actually, i was thinking you should, you know, come out and be in one of these things. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: and do what? be in a movie? yeah, i will. as long as we don't go anywhere dangerous. >> we're done with big bear. >> jimmy: yeah, my acting is impeccable. the kids will be delighted. >> this movie is basically how the wizard became the wizard of oz. i trained with lance burton.

>> jimmy: the magician, master of magic. >> yeah. is that what he goes by? >> jimmy: something like that. what is it, master of magic? >> he is a master. >> jimmy: so you trained with him? >> i did. for two weeks i think. >> jimmy: every day with lance for two weeks? >> well, here's the thing. yeah, i did, but -- and sam, my good friend sam raime the director insisted that i go out there two weeks early to learn these magic tricks and i did learn them. lance has special doves that, you know, work with him. and i ended up being able to have a flame arise in my hand and then i could do this and it would turn into a dove and pull rabbits out of hats. >> jimmy: let's do some of that right now. >> well, i need lance. [ laughter ] and i need special doves. >> jimmy: if we have lance, we don't need you. >> dicky: still ahead, chef bobby flay's cooking secrets. >> jimmy: how hard do the guys at the trademark office laugh when you said i would like to

trademark crunchify? >> dicky: rachel weisz and up next, jessica alba plays hard to get.

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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: right now jessica is outside and we have this new booth, celebrity kissing booth. how are you feeling in there, jessica? >> i'm feeling hot and bothered.

>> jimmy: oh. sal, how are you feeling? >> jimmy, some of the loneliest perverts in hollywood have assembled tonight. it's going to be a good showing. >> jimmy: how should we do this? jessica, do you want to decide with whom you will share a kiss tonight? >> oh, my god, i can't even -- you guys pick and then we'll go from there. >> jimmy: this is starting to feel like the movie "fame." okay, let's see all our candidates here, sal. let's take a look. oh, what a coincidence, we have a lot of guys lined up. hey, jessica, maybe you would prefer a woman to a man. >> yes, maybe. >> jimmy: whoa, how about the one there -- yeah, you right there in the front, with the vest on. yeah. would you like to make out with jessica alba? >> it's always been a dream of mine. >> jimmy: oh. weird, it's been a dream of mine too and i just met you. isn't that funny? all right. all right, so just step right up there. oh, it's a threesome. what's going on here?

oh, my goodness. not even any tongue there. let's have one more. one more, jessica? >> how about that young man -- that young man right there. >> jimmy: which young man? >> that young man right there. >> he's pretty disgusting. >> jimmy: he looks pretty happy. what's your name? >> my name is lifa. >> jimmy: how do you spell that? >> l-i-f-a. from south africa. >> jimmy: welcome. and what a welcome you're about to get. >> it sure is. >> jimmy: how are you going to explain this to the people back home? >> i have no idea. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: all right, lifa, you step right up. >> hi, i'm jessica first. >> jimmy: i think we made a love connection here. all right, lifa, feel free to

use tongue if you like. whatever you want to do. okay. all right. on the count of three, one, two, three -- playing hard to get, i like that. >> give me your cheek. oh! >> jimmy: nicely done, lifa. >> dicky: up next, chef bobby flay makes the perfect burger. >> don't yoer wooverwork the me. >> jimmy: i have a feeling lifa is overworking the meat right now. >> dicky: and rachel weisz about being the evil witch. >> strangely erotic. >> with the nba season and full season in full swing who better to have a quick chat than basketball legend and doctor, dr. j. tonight julius er ving stits in

for three rid di iiculous quest. >> jimmy: you know what i wanted to ask you, if you had to do you think you could make a turkey sandwich with your feet? >> oh, my god. probably no. >> jimmy: even in an emergency situation. >> i would give it a shot, i got big feet and at my age the toes don't work like they used to. >> jimmy: if you could dunk a baby, would you? >> a real baby? >> jimmy: live baby. >> probably have a problem with that. >> jimmy: okay. what happened to your afro? did you sell it? >> oh, man. >> jimmy: where is it? >> the type of hair that i have, the gray hair probably is not a

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with one hand he can roll down 10 windows plus the partition. everything he does, tacks right off. and of course he dines upon the liquid gold of velveeta shells and cheese. end of story. liquid gold. eat like that guy you know. my name is taho and i'm a fish guy. it's a labor of love. it's a lot of labor and it's a lot of love. i don't need to go to the gym. my job is my workout. you're shoveling ice all day long. it's rough on the back. it's rough on the shoulders. i get muscle aches all over. advil® is great. pain and soreness is just out of the picture. [ male announcer ] make the switch. take action. take advil®. and for sinus congestion, now you can get advil® combined with a proven decongestant. breathe easier with advil® congestion relief. but that doesn't happen much anymore. the creative process never stops. and songwriting is so hard, but i love it.

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♪ >> jimmy: we're back. with jessica alba and our next guest appears on the food network more often than food. he's a renowned chef and restaurateur with five tv shows, including "worst cooks in america." his second season premieres sunday night at 9:00. please say hello to bobby flay, everyone. bobby, how are you? good to see you. this is jessica. i don't know if you guys know each other. >> i'm moving in. >> jimmy: let's get right into this, bobby. last time you were here, we had a throwdown. >> yeah, eggplant parmesan. >> jimmy: i feel i was robbed. you won a split decision. >> i crushed you. >> jimmy: you did not crush me. >> it was a crushing. >> jimmy: it was 2-1. i was interested that you won making an eggplant parmesan

despite the fact that you did not use any parmesan. >> is that true? >> jimmy: that is true. >> you went and checked after the results came in? >> jimmy: you told me what the ingredients were. >> now we're here for the burger death match. i'm going to show you how to make the perfect burger. not the fanciest burger. the perfect burger. >> jimmy: this is a death match between me and my heart, not necessarily the two of us here. we have some meat here. you want to participate? >> okay. >> jimmy: what is the fat percentage? >> this is 80/20. if it's too lean, it's too dry and has no flavor. so basically you don't want to overwork the meat. you want to press down with your palms. check it out. hi. >> hi. >> jimmy: i have a feeling lifa is overworking the meat right now. [ laughter ] >> all right, here's a trick. when you cook a burger on a

griddle and it plumps up and people press it down with the spatula. to get it back to the shape and the juices fly out. i trick the bugger. i take my thumb and make a well in the middle of the burger. this way it actually comes back to the shape that we want it. lots of salt and pepper. >> jimmy: you put no seasoning inside the beef? >> i do not. i don't put anything inside the beef. that's meatloaf. we're making burgers. >> jimmy: interesting that you're so technical now. when your eggplant parmesan has no parmesan in it. >> that was two years ago. you're still on that? >> jimmy: of course. it was my only throwdown and i lost. >> let's toss this in here. >> jimmy: what kind of oil are we using here? >> canola oil, because obviously we're making a healthy burger. >> jimmy: nice. >> here's the story. i have these burger restaurants on the east coast. there's a sign in the kitchen that says -- >> jimmy: the letter c?

>> no. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: what does it say? >> it says bobby says melt the cheese completely. when i go to a restaurant and i order a cheeseburger i hate when they don't got extra 20 seconds and melt the cheese completely. so here's how i melt the cheese. i put a little bit of water into the pan and i cover it and i let it steam. this way the burger actually gets -- the cheese really gets nice and melty and actually drips down. now, when i was a kid, i would always eat the fries or the potato chips next to the burger, and now i do something called crunchifying your burger. which means thin, crisp potatoes on your burger. >> definitely getting a heart attack. >> jimmy: did you trademark the word crunchify? how hard did they laugh when you said i would like to trademark the word crunchify?

>> they got a lot of free burgers. can you toast some buns for us? >> i would like to -- >> jimmy: i heard you flew these buns in from new york. >> i look at the burger as the quintessential sandwich so every layer is really important. we talked about the meat. we talked about the condiments. the buns are important. i want a soft bun because i don't want an artisinal bun -- don't want a bun that is just too firm and breaks the burger up. i want it to become part of the burger. >> jimmy: yeah. no, i'm with you on that. >> me, too. >> you're not happy with this burger. >> jimmy: i'm not being sarcastic. i like a soft bun on the hamburger. >> put that right on top of there. >> jimmy: i agree with the soft bun. you're frying these. >> soft, but firm. >> soft, but firm. >> look how nice and melted the cheese is. it makes your mouth water. >> jimmy: what kind of cheese is that? cheddar? >> american. cheddar cheese is too waxy for burgers. it drives me nuts.

this is a very simple burger but it's the perfect burger. what would you like on your burger? >> jimmy: whatever you think is good. what do you think are the ideal toppings? >> ladies first. >> i'm with jimmy. >> let's make a crunch burger. >> i think that's good. >> jimmy: let's crunchify this thing. do you get like a dollar every time i say that? >> $3. >> here you go. >> jimmy: that's it, huh? >> just think crisp potato chips. >> jimmy: and you eat the stick. >> that's up to you. >> jimmy: what about this stuff? >> you said you didn't want anything on there. >> jimmy: said whatever you think. >> all right, so a little bit of red onion. just a very thin slice. you like pickles? >> i like pickles. but you're definitely not kissing anyone after that red onion. >> well, your kissing is over for the night. >> jimmy: we might go back out there. [ laughter ] crunchifying. >> mustard.

>> chipotle ketchup. >> that is your thing? >> i have all these chipotle recipes. >> i didn't trademark that yet. here we go. >> is that mine? okay. >> the deal is that you just take it and you pick it up and you crunch it, just like this. you can hear that crunch. it's nice and juicy. you just take a bite. >> jimmy: guillermo, you want to share this with me? >> guillermo, i just ate your burger. >> jimmy: that's all right. he can share it with me. we share food anyway. remember jessica said she was vomiting yesterday? [ laughter ] >> how about some guacamole? >> guillermo still loves me. we shared a booth. >> jimmy: this is absolutely delicious. >> this is like the best burger ever. >> jimmy: i'm sorry my mouth is full. where do you find the worst cooks in america? [ laughter ] >> don't you feed him? >> jimmy: sometimes.

>> dicky: up next, rachel weisz learns something new about elvis >> jimmy: he died on the toilet. which is how i want to go.

[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: say hello to rachel wei weisz. [ cheers and applause ] are those for me? >> it's a little sad as a bunch. but it's happy valentine's day. >> jimmy: happy valentine's day to you. thank you very much. >> oh, thank you! >> jimmy: should i be worried about giving james bond's wife roses? i feel like there's laser things on my head right now. >> he likes you. also, james bond would never get married. you know, he only has one-night stands. doesn't he, right? >> jimmy: that's true. he did have a wife at one time, i think. early in the james bond story

and then something terrible happened. and now he's avenging her death. >> really? they were married? >> jimmy: i could be wrong. guillermo, is that how it was? >> yeah. then they kill her. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: okay, thank you. is valentine's day a big thing in england too? >> yeah, it's the same as here. it's very busy for florists. >> jimmy: sure. you pay like three times as much for the flowers. are you insistent -- i guess the fact that you're here means that you're not particularly -- >> i'm spending it with you, jimmy. >> jimmy: yes, you're spending it with me. is it an important holiday to you? >> well, i mean, i don't think of it like some official holiday where people stop working and the world stops. it's like it's a hallmark holiday, wouldn't you say? >> jimmy: absolutely. there's no question about it. >> i'm not big on it. >> jimmy: that's good. i like that. it's kind of ridiculous, the whole thing. >> i think you show your love throughout the year. >> jimmy: yeah. we don't do that anyway, but it's a good point. when guys say every day is

valentine's day. that means no day is ever valentine's day. >> well, i'm a woman and i'm not so into it. >> jimmy: same here. when did you first come to the united states? >> oh, i like that. when did i first come here. i came here the very first time with my mom and dad when i was about 12 and we went to -- came to california and we went to disneyland and then we went to yosemite. >> jimmy: that's nice. it was a vacation. and you were here for a little while? >> yeah, it was like a two-week holiday. i couldn't believe how many channels there were on the tv. because in england, we only at that point had four channels. bbc1, bbc2, itv -- actually, three. >> jimmy: so you came to watch television. >> we didn't want to go anywhere because there were like 60 channels. it was incredible. >> jimmy: is that right? you got cable later than we did. >> yeah, i think the '90s. >> jimmy: what do you remember watching? >> "the brady bunch." "zorro."

"little house on the prairie." >> jimmy: do you even have prairies? >> no, it's very exotic to us. >> jimmy: i heard you're an elvis fan. >> i am. >> jimmy: you even made a pilgrimage -- it's a pilgrimage when you go to graceland. it's not just a vacation. >> i did when i was kind of grown up, i did two road trips in america with friends. the second one was with a girlfriend called mel. we drove through the south. we started in new orleans, we wiggled our way through the south. we stopped -- actually, we got stuck in memphis for ages. we had like an itinerary of everywhere we wanted to go and we ended up spending a long time in memphis. >> jimmy: it's hard to get past the ribs. >> i love memphis. it's a great city. >> jimmy: i've never been to graceland. is that everything that everyone says it is? >> oh, it's fabulous. it's kitschy. you get taken into his bedroom, which he has this huge bed with

like leopard skin -- i think fake leopard skin, of course, kind of sheets everywhere. it was fabulous. >> jimmy: do you like fat elvis or thin elvis? >> i'd take him any way. and the fabulous thing about elvis is that even when he was fat and very drunk and high on a lot of drugs, he could still -- nothing could touch that voice. i mean, have you seen those -- you know, when he's singing in vegas. >> jimmy: i grew up in las vegas. >> did you? really? >> jimmy: he's like a saint there. >> you know, when he's singing and he's forgetting the lines and giggling and everything. but nothing could get in the way of that gift. >> jimmy: you know what i love most about elvis is he died on the toilet, which is how i want to go. [ laughter ] >> is that really true? >> jimmy: yeah, he did. >> on the toilet? is that like public record? >> jimmy: well, no, his family told me and i thought this was the time to reveal it. no, yeah. elvis died on the toilet. >> really? >> jimmy: i know all sorts of stuff. i'll tell you some more things. >> he was sitting on it with his pants down? >> jimmy: yes, he was.